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BacktotheShadows

Do you ever just feel sad?

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There are times when just out of the blue I feel sad.  Nothing happened I just feel sad.  I sit here all day and just look at my computer, my trees, and my garden which helps.  But mostly I feel sad inside.  I have been like this since I quit my last job.  Sitting in an office all day the size of a prison cell completing all my duties in an hour and then sit there the rest of the day looking at the walls, it was just not for me.  I want a job, but my psychologist thinks that it is a bad idea, she says that I am setting myself up for failure because if I don't get hired it just leads to more depression and sadness.  I am at the crossroads of my life.  I have to look for a job that I can actually do due to my disabilities incurred while in the Army, which narrows down my job opportunities.  I don't have to worry about money because of my pension and VA Compensation for my disabilities, but I want to feel like I am contributing to society and not just another burden on society if that makes sense. They give me all kinds of medications for my mental issues but I think they are doing more harm then good, but if I don't take them I feel 10x worse, so it is an uphill climb.  Like for example, I am taking 300mg of Lithium a day, I feel groggy, confused, and I lose track of time.  Sometimes I will be looking at my computer, start looking at my trees and 2 hours have pasted. I just wanted to vent a little and to let you all know how I feel everyday.  So if I say something stupid don't take it personal, I sometimes don't know what I am saying.  I am glad I found this place and I feel like I have some real friends on here.  Thank you all for listening.  Love you all,

BttS

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Posted (edited)

Hi, BacktotheShadows.

I understand, because there are days that I too seem to be sad without any particular reason. I guess people would never have guessed that of me judging from my post history. But I don't mind opening myself. I am only human, after all. 

When those days happens, I make sure to meditate and fill my subconscious with positive and loving commands that I repeat mentally and orally as well. If you really do believe and work towards achieving what you say, it will manifest itself.

Now one thing that really stood out to me in your post is the attitude of your psychologist. A good psychologist will plant the seeds of happiness into his client and to the best of his abilties will make sure that you cultivate those seeds so they can blossom into beautiful flowers and trees.It works kind of like a good car seller, but without actually screwing you up. Lol. 

Personally, do you really believe that not being hired will make you more sad? I think that you would feel better going out and trying. And since money is not an issue, if you don't end up finding a job that you feel good doing, there are a lot of charities and community associations that might be in need of a helping hand. They are full of loving people that I am sure you could end up being comfortable with. Studies have shown that most people end up doing good deeds out of ego, because it makes them feel better about themselves. But if you put your ego aside, personally, I still find that helping others is what pleases me the most.

Whether you believe your psychologist or not, either way you'll be right. Get what I mean? It seems like his diploma is not worth any cent more than the piece of paper it is printed on. 

I'll stop here with the life advices because I am such a young man, who I am to say all those things to someone whom has way more life experience under his belt than me?

But your post touched me, because some days I am sad too. It happens to everybody, and people telling the contrary are simply liars.

With love,

Michael.

Edited by Zireael
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You're in a unique position of having enough money and not having to worry about that.  Find something you like to do and you might possibly turn a hobby into a business.  It would give you a creative outlet, occupy your mind and you might make some money, too. 

Write a story, take an online writing class. I know you can write.  :)  :hug:

Everyone gets sad for no reason at one time or another.  I found out that one way to change my feelings about anything is to write them down and then burn it or delete it if I'm doing it in notepad or whatever. But physically writing it and burning it with flames seems more effective. I always feel different about what's bothering me after I do that.  You're entitled to have feelings, whatever they might be, they're a part of all of us. 

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11 minutes ago, Zireael said:

Hi, BacktotheShadows.

I understand, because there are days that I too seem to be sad without any particular reason. I guess people would never have guessed that of me judging from my post history. But I don't mind opening myself. I am only human, after all. 

When those days happens, I make sure to meditate and fill my subconscious with positive and loving commands that I repeat mentally and orally as well. If you really do believe and work towards achieving what you say, it will manifest itself.

Now one thing that really stood out to me in your post is the attitude of your psychologist. A good psychologist will plant the seeds of happiness into his client and to the best of his abilties will make sure that you cultivate those seeds so they can blossom into beautiful flowers and trees.It works kind of like a good car seller, but without actually screwing you up. Lol. 

Personally, do you really believe that not being hired will make you more sad? I think that you would feel better going out and trying. And since money is not an issue, if you don't end up finding a job that you feel good doing, there are a lot of charities and community associations that might be in need of a helping hand. They are full of loving people that I am sure you could end up being comfortable with. Studies have shown that most people end up doing good deeds out of ego, because it makes them feel better about themselves. But if you put your ego aside, personally, I still find that helping others is what pleases me the most.

Whether you believe your psychologist or not, either way you'll be right. Get what I mean? It seems like his diploma is not worth any cent more than the piece of paper it is printed on. 

I'll stop here with the life advices because I am such a young man, who I am to say all those things to someone whom has way more life experience under his belt than me?

But your post touched me, because some days I am sad too. It happens to everybody, and people telling the contrary are simply liars.

With love,

Michael.

Michael, Thank you for your words of wisdom!  For being such a young man you speak very well.  I will continue to look for work and attempt to find a job I am happy with.  Thank you again my friend,

Love ya,

David

3 minutes ago, Cinnamon said:

You're in a unique position of having enough money and not having to worry about that.  Find something you like to do and you might possibly turn a hobby into a business.  It would give you a creative outlet, occupy your mind and you might make some money, too. 

Write a story, take an online writing class. I know you can write.  :)  :hug:

Everyone gets sad for no reason at one time or another.  I found out that one way to change my feelings about anything is to write them down and then burn it or delete it if I'm doing it in notepad or whatever. But physically writing it and burning it with flames seems more effective. I always feel different about what's bothering me after I do that.  You're entitled to have feelings, whatever they might be, they're a part of all of us. 

Cinn,

My best friend on COP.  Thank you for your kind words.  I have decided to write a book to occupy my time.  Thank you!

Love you,

David

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When I have an emotion that seems out of place, I check all factors in my life. If there is no real reason for me to feel that feeliing, I assume it is due to empathy for someone close by, (might even be in a car driving by) or TPTB are sending me something. After a moment's evaluation, I can now shrug and say, this isn't mine. Soon after, the feeling stops. If I own it, it lingers.

I don't know if the cause is spiritual or mechanical, but simple acknowledgment has worked for me. Hope this helps.

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BlondeNude
1 minute ago, Picklesnout said:

When I have an emotion that seems out of place, I check all factors in my life. If there is no real reason for me to feel that feeliing, I assume it is due to empathy for someone close by, (might even be in a car driving by) or TPTB are sending me something. After a moment's evaluation, I can now shrug and say, this isn't mine. Soon after, the feeling stops. If I own it, it lingers.

I don't know if the cause is spiritual or mechanical, but simple acknowledgment has worked for me. Hope this helps.

If I experience joy, like from music or a good memory or whatever, I will get sad and cry within ten seconds. I never can understand it. Like I feel guilty to be happy.

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1 minute ago, Picklesnout said:

When I have an emotion that seems out of place, I check all factors in my life. If there is no real reason for me to feel that feeliing, I assume it is due to empathy for someone close by, (might even be in a car driving by) or TPTB are sending me something. After a moment's evaluation, I can now shrug and say, this isn't mine. Soon after, the feeling stops. If I own it, it lingers.

I don't know if the cause is spiritual or mechanical, but simple acknowledgment has worked for me. Hope this helps.

I should be feeling happy in the position I am in, however I don't feel any happiness.  I am down and depressed.  I try to think of the positive things in life and it get's me no where, I feel the same.  I will attempt what you suggested and try to shrug it off.  The only problem is that I feel a lot of guilt for my fallen Soldiers which causes me much pain and suffering.  I think of my Soldiers each and every day and I am unable to stop.

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8 minutes ago, BacktotheShadows said:

Michael, Thank you for your words of wisdom!  For being such a young man you speak very well.  I will continue to look for work and attempt to find a job I am happy with.  Thank you again my friend,

Love ya,

David

Cinn,

My best friend on COP.  Thank you for your kind words.  I have decided to write a book to occupy my time.  Thank you!

Love you,

David

If it's action/adventure let me be the first to read it!  

You are loved. 

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3 minutes ago, BlondeNude said:

If I experience joy, like from music or a good memory or whatever, I will get sad and cry within ten seconds. I never can understand it. Like I feel guilty to be happy.

I know the feeling my friend.  I attempt to look at good videos, good music, and upbeat writings, but I feel guilty about being happy and instead it makes me sad.

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7 minutes ago, BlondeNude said:

If I experience joy, like from music or a good memory or whatever, I will get sad and cry within ten seconds. I never can understand it. Like I feel guilty to be happy.

Did they check younfor pseudo bulbar affect as well? It may really be beyond your control.

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BlondeNude
1 minute ago, Picklesnout said:

Did they check younfor pseudo bulbar affect as well? It may really be beyond your control.

I never go to the doctor unless I have a broken femur or whatever. I have had several head injuries and I know that is part of the problem since like 1987.

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