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Didnt stand a chance

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My dad asked me why I think it is, that he doesn't have the same level of love for me, as maybe he would have.. If my childhood would have gone in some other direction.

I told him, I'm sorry, but I really didn't stand a chance against being violent and abusive, that's just how it is.

You raised me in Philadelphia, you relied on the government to provide me with everything from an education, to rehabilitation and its second rate, its junk for people like me, maybe not for other kids,  but to me and people like me, its junk... and its also a bad school that adhere to a different set of educational standards... and those standards ARE inferior. 

You raised me in a bad neighborhood, a white neighborhood, but also a bad one...  everytime I stepped out of my house and walked a little too far... it was always something... always some street thug motherfucker doing some shit...  to a young child... from 5 years old, all the way until I could fight back and kick their ass..  in the mean time, I just get worse and worse and worse.


You don't want to leave philly, so that's you get....  My violence, and my abuse of you and mom is what you get when you don't want to solve the underlying problem, and that problem was Philadelphia.

And when you did leave the big cities... it was way too late.

I wasn't entitled to an education anymore...  I don't get the same level of care from professionals anymore...  I don't get the affection from people anymore.....   the things that I needed are a ghost now.

Well I'm sorry for being violent towards you and mom....but obviously it took a toll... as I said... I didn't stand a chance of having a normal, healthy relationship with you and mom.

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 CGK    2,171


I'm going to move your post to the OT section of COP.  We like to keep the main forum for news stories.

I'm concerned about some of the statements you made in your post.

"My violence, and my abuse of you and mom is what you get when you don't want to solve the underlying problem, and that problem was Philadelphia."

Violence and abuse towards your parents will not solve anything. I feel that you need to reach outside your family circle and seek some help.  This might be a good place to start, or they may be able to direct you to an agency who can help you with your parental problems.

Crisis Intervention and Support

Ready and Responsive Resources

The Department of Behavioral Health & Intellectual disAbility Services provides a wide range of services to assist Philadelphia residents, families or provider agencies to deal with behavioral health emergencies.

Suicide & Crisis Intervention Service (215) 686-4420. This service provides a round-the-clock telephone hotline to respond to behavioral health emergencies.

Home Visiting Teams. Several DBHIDS Community Mental Health Centers have Mobile Home Visiting Teams to provide brief, supportive mental health counseling for families and consumers unable to access office-based services.



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I'm out of Philadelphia now, and our relationship is now normal.


Interesting that you reveal this personal information here. If it is indeed true, then you will find a way to move on in spite of your unhappy childhood. 

Parenting is the hardest job in the world. And the most important. And the most rewarding. Boys, more than girls, require  much attention to their emotional development. 

Wordsworth said it best. The child is father to the man.

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