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Fourth echelon

What if everything you knew about disciplining kids was wrong?

23 posts in this topic

Leigh Robinson was out for a lunchtime walk one brisk day during the spring of 2013 when a call came from the principal at her school. Will, a third-grader with a history of acting up in class, was flipping out on the playground. He'd taken off his belt and was flailing it around and grunting. The recess staff was worried he might hurt someone. Robinson, who was Will's educational aide, raced back to the schoolyard.

Will was "that kid." Every school has a few of them: that kid who's always getting into trouble, if not causing it. That kid who can't stay in his seat and has angry outbursts and can make a teacher's life hell. That kid the other kids blame for a recess tussle. Will knew he was that kid too. Ever since first grade, he'd been coming to school anxious, defensive, and braced for the next confrontation with a classmate or teacher.

The expression "school-to-prison pipeline" was coined to describe how America's public schools fail kids like Will. A first-grader whose unruly behavior goes uncorrected can become the fifth-grader with multiple suspensions, the eighth-grader who self-medicates, the high school dropout, and the 17-year-old convict. Yet even though today's teachers are trained to be sensitive to "social-emotional development" and schools are committed to mainstreaming children with cognitive or developmental issues into regular classrooms, those advances in psychology often go out the window once a difficult kid starts acting out. Teachers and administrators still rely overwhelmingly on outdated systems of reward and punishment, using everything from red-yellow-green cards, behavior charts, and prizes to suspensions and expulsions.

http://www.sott.net/article/298804-What-if-everything-you-knew-about-disciplining-kids-was-wrong

 
 
 
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Yeah, and one thing which really saddens me is when people hit their kids, thinking, somehow, "it's normal", etc.  When I was at school in this lifetime they still had corporal punishment.  Pretty disgusting.  Humanity hasn't moved on much and 'the system' is pretty messed up, which, of course, tptb do on purpose.

Edited by Sky Cat

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Yeah, and one thing which really saddens me is when people hit their kids, thinking, somehow, "it's normal", etc.  When I was at school in this lifetime they still had corporal punishment.  Pretty disgusting.  Humanity hasn't moved on much and 'the system' is pretty messed up, which, of course, tptb do on purpose.

Splain exactly what you mean!

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Splain exactly what you mean!

Growing up, when in school.  I mention this lifetime so as to provide context (which is probably not needed anyway.)  In some of my other lifetimes corporal punishment was also the norm.  I don't have full recall of them all, which is the case for anyone here in a body because of the limitations of the body; but, yes, in many parts of the world in the recent past (past few thousand years), people also did that (hit their kids.)  Western society has made some progress in this regard, but, sadly, not enough.

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Leigh Robinson was out for a lunchtime walk one brisk day during the spring of 2013 when a call came from the principal at her school. Will, a third-grader with a history of acting up in class, was flipping out on the playground. He'd taken off his belt and was flailing it around and grunting. The recess staff was worried he might hurt someone. Robinson, who was Will's educational aide, raced back to the schoolyard.

Will was "that kid." Every school has a few of them: that kid who's always getting into trouble, if not causing it. That kid who can't stay in his seat and has angry outbursts and can make a teacher's life hell. That kid the other kids blame for a recess tussle. Will knew he was that kid too. Ever since first grade, he'd been coming to school anxious, defensive, and braced for the next confrontation with a classmate or teacher.

The expression "school-to-prison pipeline" was coined to describe how America's public schools fail kids like Will. A first-grader whose unruly behavior goes uncorrected can become the fifth-grader with multiple suspensions, the eighth-grader who self-medicates, the high school dropout, and the 17-year-old convict. Yet even though today's teachers are trained to be sensitive to "social-emotional development" and schools are committed to mainstreaming children with cognitive or developmental issues into regular classrooms, those advances in psychology often go out the window once a difficult kid starts acting out. Teachers and administrators still rely overwhelmingly on outdated systems of reward and punishment, using everything from red-yellow-green cards, behavior charts, and prizes to suspensions and expulsions.

http://www.sott.net/article/298804-What-if-everything-you-knew-about-disciplining-kids-was-wrong

 
 
 

I was very much like "Will" in the above story. Since I knew many things that the average person
never learned, I became somewhat confrontational mainly with the adults like parents, teachers,
pastors, friends parents, etc. I even gave the older kids fits. That's the way it is when you think
you know everything, and when you believe you're special.

The kids my age? I had fun playing around with their heads. I used every mind game in the books,
and even made up a few of my own as I went, I'm ashamed to admit that I took complete advantage
of many of them by manipulation, and became the ring leader in my hometown. For a while I became
a big troublemaker, and even got away with it for the longest time.... but....

I was quickly challenged by the very people who taught me, and put forever in my place. After that,
I applied myself fully with the renewed spirit of intent to become what I was meant to be. Long hours
and very hard and dedicated work finally paid off, and at that point I knew I had arrived, and became
a better person.

My life still today is one of seeking knowledge and understanding because when one believes they
know everything, that's when the learning ends, and the ignorance overtakes them because of it!

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Growing up, when in school.  I mention this lifetime so as to provide context (which is probably not needed anyway.)  In some of my other lifetimes corporal punishment was also the norm.  I don't have full recall of them all, which is the case for anyone here in a body because of the limitations of the body; but, yes, in many parts of the world in the recent past (past few thousand years), people also did that (hit their kids.)  Western society has made some progress in this regard, but, sadly, not enough.

I asked you the above because I do not believe in past lives, and a comment also about
punishing children... Spare not the rod! One should never strike their children with their
hands as the hand should be trusted and respected. We see this with pets, and dogs in
particular.

Dogs that are continually stuck with the hand become timid and shy away when a hand
is placed near their line of view. However, striking your dog with a rolled up newpaper
across thier rump works wonders as does the rod across a childs rump.

Sometimes correction of this kind is needed when verbal warings are no longer taken
seriously, and more drastic, and more direct measures may be needed. This way the
person administering correction still remains respected because the one on the receiving
end remembers the lesson learned into adulthood! They become more productive, and
not spoiled like those who never received any kind of correction as children.

With most children, verbal correction is not enough!

Edited by Cryptic Mole

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I asked you the above because I do not believe in past lives, and a comment also aboutpunishing children... Spare not the rod! One should never strike their children with their
hands as the hand should be trusted and respected. We see this with pets, and dogs in
particular.

Dogs that are continually stuck with the hand become timid and shy away when a hand
is placed near their line of view. However, striking your dog with a rolled up newpaper
across thier rump works wonders as does the rod across a childs rump.

Sometimes correction of this kind is needed when verbal warings are no longer taken
seriously, and more drastic, and more direct measures may be needed. This way the
person administering correction still remains respected because the one on the receiving
end remembers the lesson learned into adulthood! They become more productive, and
not spoiled like those who never received any kind of correction as children.

With most children, verbal correction is not enough!

I see

Other lives we each have, of that I can assure you; but no matter, I'm not here to convince anyone of anything nor is that the topic of this thread.

To me the very notion of "punishment" is repugnant.  Forsooth, it is a notion held by aspects of the human race on Earth; just not one I choose to ascribe to, but then again I'm not from 'around here', even though I've been incarnating on this planet for some time.

The notion of punishment is a distortion of Human values; it has become a tradition and become 'human', except it never was.

Corporal punishment really deserves no places amongst any race which might aspire to be divine, and the human race's condition is fallen, even grovelling at the feet of its captors at the current point in time.  When is was not fallen, neither was the notion of punishment present, and it can be so once more.

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End results of sparing the rod! Should have whipped her
spoiled fucking ass way before the Lexus was given! That
little spoiled brat will be that way for the rest of her life!
Picture what she'll sound like when she's 80 and still like
that!

Edited by Cryptic Mole

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Much depends on the social background of the kid involved.  Sure, discipline is an absolute must in life.  It is basically because of a lack of discipline and the over simplification of this dreaded concept "human rights" that we have all these violent demonstrations in the world - every country bar a few have these rioting fools.  Clearly you cannot solve anything in such a manner because the other party will eventually give in but a whole lot of animosity will prevail.

As for physically hitting kids?  It has to be really the last resort and the reason for the "punitory justice" needs to be explained, and should never be administered in a rage!

I cannot see however how you can hit a kid to obey and love you.  If someone would hit me physically without real reason, resentment will soon replace respect.

A very fine line - but discipline should and must be instilled from the first day, else you have kids that grow-up like billy-goats, which when they're grownup are basically immovable in their warped ways. #Ferguson 

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I believe it is a parent's responsibility to teach their kids how to live in the world with other humans and be a respectful adult. Children ALWAYS test boundaries and if they don't have any then they end up as insufferable dolts. Beatings are abuse. A slap across the face is abuse. A pop on the butt gets their attention and if you've done the other things right then they won't keep repeating the same mistakes. If you've spent any time on forums you can easily spot children masquerading as adults that weren't disciplined properly and could use a good butt popping. It's probably too late for them and they'll keep mouthing off until someone IRL gives them a lesson they can't bounce back from but by then they've already spread their poison through society. Cooperation is a lost art.

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It's not so bad, getting our ass's kicked, me, my brother and my cousin deserved it. haha!

We were little buggers back in those days. =)

I remember I left the overhead Cabinet open, and my grandmother walked right into it, next thing I knew I had a flying shoe going into my direction (face), haha, so funny.

Other times we would get chased out the home with the broom, ahh good times, great stories.

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It's not so bad, getting our ass's kicked, me, my brother and my cousin deserved it. haha!

We were little buggers back in those days. =)

I remember I left the overhead Cabinet open, and my grandmother walked right into it, next thing I knew I had a flying shoe going into my direction (face), haha, so funny.

Other times we would get chased out the home with the broom, ahh good times, great stories.

At just 4 years old, I got caught on the wrong end of a mop stick right across
my face. Split my upper and lower lips... blood everywhere. My mom was a
fucking nutjob, but I have since forgiven her!

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